30 Ways to Tell If You (or a Loved One) Loves Spreadsheets Too Much

You know that person who has a spreadsheet for everything… or maybe that person is you. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. I myself have been guilty of loving spreadsheets too much. And it didn’t stop there. I led people to believe that spreadsheets were the best way to make a Gantt chart, or analyze Mailchimp data, or god forbid, make a REST API. It embarrasses me to say it, but recognition is the first step to recovery.

I finally came to an awakening. I got married to a lovely woman, but my spreadsheet love persisted… then I started working at Panoply. I realized that there is a better way to manage data. It’s called a data warehouse, and it’s changed my life.

We at Panoply, (many who have been guilty of loving spreadsheets too much) have compiled this list for you to diagnose yourself and those you love. But be careful. Self-diagnosis is risky. The true test is whether you too will be enlightened by a data warehouse. To find out, start your free trial of Panoply today. Without further ado, here’s our list.

• You watch Youtube videos with titles like “Top 10 Crazy Spreadsheet Fails!”
• You have fond (or not so fond) memories of Clippy

• You dream in rows and columns
• You ruin Thanksgiving dinner with heated arguments about Excel vs. Google Sheets
• You wrote a VBA script that orders your lunch for you
• You can rank your top 5 favorite formulae
• You think “Big Data” is anything that exceeds Excel’s row count maximum
• You went to IKEA and asked where they keep “pivot tables” then got offended when no one laughed
• You have a spreadsheet for literally every problem
• You know more Excel keyboard shortcuts than coworkers
• You referred to moving in with your significant other as “merging cells”
• Just seeing #div/0! frustrates you
• You have a spreadsheet to organize your spreadsheets
• You listed Excel as a hobby on Facebook
• This is your kind of art

• You start all of your text messages with “=”
• You have a spreadsheet called “Secret Sauce” that determines your fantasy football draft
• You planned your first date, wedding, and honeymoon in spreadsheets
• You have three spreadsheets open right now
• You get frustrated because your refrigerator doesn’t have a VLOOKUP
• You ruin Thanksgiving dinner with heated arguments about Excel vs Google Sheets
• You call Excel and a calculator your “data stack“
• You refer to your Instagram photos by their column letter and row number in your home page
• Your idea of collaboration is sending an Excel file in an email
• You rely on =SUM to get the result of 2+2
• You use Solver to plan your grocery list
• You don’t take offense to people calling you an “Excel Nerd”
• You have Excel opens automatically when you turn on your computer
• You have mrexcel.com bookmarked on your desktop
• You rely on spreadsheets to solve comics
• You have the Excel mobile app on your phone
• You dress up as a pivot table for Halloween

Did we miss something? Leave it in the comments and we’ll add it to the list.